Setting Boundaries With Family and Friends When Planning Your Wedding
From the moment you get engaged, you’ll probably be flooded with well-meaning comments, advice, and offers of help from your friends and family. While it’s nice to know that people are so excited for you, it can also be overwhelming. And when it comes to planning one of the most important days of your life, it’s important to remember that ultimately, it’s your wedding. But how do you politely set expectations with family and friends while still maintaining healthy relationships? Read on for some tips!
Communicate Early and Often
The key to setting boundaries during wedding planning is communication. Be upfront about how you envision the planning process going and any limitations you have in terms of budget, time, and availability. Explain that while input is appreciated, that ultimately you and your partner are excited to consider all recommendations and decide together on the final details.
Be Clear About What You Don’t Want
It can be hard to say no to those closest to us, but often times there is no better way to set a boundary than by being direct about what we don’t want. For example, if Aunt Mary has offered her services as a wedding planner and you aren’t interested in having someone else take the reins (no matter how much she insists), then tell her kindly that you appreciate her offer but plan on handling things yourself or with the help of a professional planner. This way she won’t feel slighted or disappointed because you were honest about your expectations up front.
Set Expectations for Offers of Help
If you are open to help and input from family and friends, be sure to spell out exactly what it is that you need help with. This way they can focus on the tasks at hand while feeling like they’re contributing to your wedding.
Give Your Boundaries a Positive Spin
It’s hard to say no, so when setting boundaries it’s helpful to frame them in a positive way. This approach allows you to express your wishes without alienating or offending anyone.
Finally, remember that setting boundaries isn’t just about maintaining healthy relationships with family and friends – it’s also about staying true to what you envision your special day to be like. If you keep communication open and honest throughout the planning process, you’ll be able to enjoy your wedding day with the peace-of-mind that comes from knowing it was planned exactly as you wanted.
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